...
Just imagine how perfect it would be if Michael Fassbender and Tom Hiddleston made a movie together, as brothers.

sottilestrano:

My ovaries just can’t take it. But I need it so bad.

me: i haven't taken a photo of me in awhile
*takes photo*
me: oh thats why
Person: Disney is stupid
Person: Disney is only for kids
Person: Disney is gay
Me:
Person:
Me:
Police: So can you tell me what happened?
Me: He ran into my knife.
Me: He ran into my knife ten times.

Mythbusters seriously needs to do an episode to see if two people could actually fit on that goddamn door without flipping it or sinking it so that we can finally put this issue to bed after fifteen years.

English Teacher: Now I want you to tell me the saddest love story you have ever encountered.
Me: Well, it all began when two babies were born in a different place and time. The boy grew up to be a successful young man who roams around the world to showcase his talent while the girl stayed in the sea of faces who admired him. He doesn't know her, but she knows him, from his real name to what his favorite color is. She sends him love letters, even if she's aware that he won't be able to read it and she has to pay loads of money just to watch him perform for a few hours. That pattern goes on and on, unceasingly. The boy continues to walk in his dream, while the girl could only look at him with pure admiration, and sadly, that's how it'll end. The boy...will never know just how much the girl loves him.
English Teacher: That's quite sad.
Me: Oh, the life of a fangirl really is sad, Teach.
English Teacher: What
Me: What
Fact #57

pikekitty:

I want to learn phonetics simply because of Professor Higgins.

thehilariousblog:

Click here for more hilarious posts
xxchantellexx:

Tom Felton. (clipped to polyvore.com)